Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize