So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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