I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
