I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
