I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
