is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
