guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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