This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize