i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
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