About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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