; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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