I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
