She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
