Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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