I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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