He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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