And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
