well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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