I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize