Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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