gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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