brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
