I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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