i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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