Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
