I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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