I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
