Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
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Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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