My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Randomize
