is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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