Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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