Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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