I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
