I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Nicole vs. Life
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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