we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
