Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
