piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize