i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
