did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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