She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize