I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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