It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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