How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
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