that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
