Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
We got so high we made milksteak
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
