So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
