went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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