It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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