I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
