As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
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He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
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If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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