you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
